Entering a new covenant

People's been asking me how's married life. I usually give one of two answers. (1) It's too short to assess or comment. (2) Not much difference.

No. (2) is the lazy answer, 'cuz actually there is a difference. There's a "permanence" to our new status to each other as husband and wife. During the courtship days, I can still entertain the thought that we may not end up marrying one another, and so there is sometimes reservation and withholding of affections and giving of self. But, after the vows are said, it's different. And so, I begin to appreciate the safety that a covenantal relationship like a christian marriage offers. And within this safe boundary, we're free to love and honor one another. So contrary to popular belief, marriage is not the graveyard (to romance), but a place of freedom. Of course, subject to undying commitment and faithfulness to work through this marriage before God.

Another difference is the state of peace we seem to enter. It seems that previously we have to strive and work hard in the courtship period - for each other's respect, affection and commitment. But, once we enter the marriage, the striving stops. It's no longer about what we do or say to impress or win the other person over. The person has been won over regardless of what we now do or say. I don't mean that we stop doing anything to put deposits in our Love Bank. It's pretty much like God's covenantal relationship with us. Before we enter that covenant, we strive and work hard to try to "save" ourselves (to no avail). But, once we enter, it's not so much about the striving and working hard for our salvation, but to just BE, because God has unilaterally provided a way to protect, love and safe us in this covenantal relationship. And our christian marriage is to demonstrate and show the world what this covenantal relationship is like.

So, these are my few thoughts, as I enter the days of being a Mrs. As much as that is the license to another stage of adulthood, yet I feel very young and inexperienced at the same time. It's a whole new thing, and I have so much to learn and practice.